I just joined yesterday, thanks for the acceptance. :)
I guess i should introduce myself, though i'm not sure how so heres a few things about me.
My name is Amanda
I'm 22 years old.
I like driving for no reason, reading books of all types, any kind of music, going to shows, seeing movies and hanging at the diner with my bestfriend, Vicky.
I live in Telford, PA with my friend Scotty. We have a nice 2 bedroom apartment with 2 pet rats, Benny and Ryan. Scott's usually busy with his car club and me with my work (i'm a baker) so we usually don't see each other but when we do it usually long talks or movie time :).
Today I am celebrating 3 weeks clean from heroin. The short story on that. I was a cutter since i was 11 years old. I also felt very bad about myself. When i was 19 i met a guy Jack who made me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world, my cutting still continued and got worse when i start taking care of him. he was a heroin addict who told me he was clean and may have been but about a month into our relationship he relapsed. Shortly after i found out my other roommate at the time was using. About a month after that i stuck my first needle in my arm. My using became out of control in a short time. I lost a lot of weight and actually though my life was going to shambles i felt fairly good about myself because of the weight loss and i stopped cutting. Finally it was the end. i got arrested and Jack ran. I spent about a month in jail and then 4 and half months in rehab. I got out in Feburary of this year. I was living in my car and despratly depressed. I picked myself up enough to get my job back at the bakery. about 3 weeks out of rehab i relapsed. i wanted to be thin again. i did it off and on and in that time was able to save enough (with the help of my case work and my roomie) money to get an apartment. In the begining of May heroin had taken hold of me again, it got so bad i was up to 13 bags a day by the time i went to detox on Sept 14th. the rehab i was at send me home sick and of course i went right back to using. finally life fell into my lap. I met Dr. Donald Levin. Currently i am taking a medication called Suboxone along with a anti-depressant and intense therapy. I feel happy and proud today. things are looking up. My bakery managers is doing the work to move me up to asst. manager, my family is happy to have their daughter back and my bestfriend and roommate are estatic to see me smile again.
So i guess thats me.
I'm happy this community exist. I am becoming accepting of my body, the weight, the scars and the tracks. But I want to love my body and from some of the previous entries i know this is a tight, loving community that gives curvy girls a chance to really love themselves.
So thank you to jumpinglegacy
it was her post that brought me here. ( Here are a few photos of meCollapse )
Take Care everyone and thanks Again -Manda